You are in charge of your own experience

Most of us love events, meetups. parties, etc.when we enjoy them.

But, what about when things don’t go like you expected?

I just wanted to take a short minute to share my experience and opinion on something that was recently brought to my attention.

We had a couple drive in from a long distance to a public event. It was a rather medium sized event with about 50 people present.

Most of the people were new (meaning their first visit or first time coming to a Poly meetup with the people who were present) with a maybe about 30% being people that are close friends or family (in the Poly sense of family). The other 70% consisted of people who had never met the other people at the event or who had only had exposure to the others at previous events (of which there have been about 4 or 5).

This couple felt like they were receiving “dirty looks” from a majority of the people present at this event. They commented that they did not feel comfortable and that it was “cliquish”. They had also mentioned ” I honestly was introverted tonight. Nervous and shy.” at the outset of the message they sent to me.

Now, I am not saying their experience was not true for them. I am not saying they did not experience this happening. But, I will say that we are in control of our own experience.

Nothing I can do, nothing anyone else can do, can make you react the way you choose to react. Any reaction is a choice (whether or not you realize it or even consciously choose it.). The way you “feel” is directly a result of what you allowed to happen in your mind. A lot of this comes from past experiences and conditioning and can feel like it is out of our control. But, it’s not.

Whenever you are attending any event, just remember. Everything you experience is being filtered through your perceptions. You may have underlying preconceived expectations and perceptions that cloud and/or create a convoluted experience for you. It will seem real to you. It will be real for you. But, you could have changed that reality ( I have personally experienced this myself on more than one occasion.).

I say this just to encourage you to try to leave any negative expectations, negative preconceived ideas, fears, hopes, negative past experiences behind at the door when you come to an event. It is important for you, if you want to have the best experience possible, to try, well… to have the best experience possible.

For the most part. People are not out to create an inhospitable experience for others at these public events. Even if they are, you can prevent that from happening by re-framing your experience to better suit what you want to experience.

Here is a short article I think could be beneficial in helping to explain what I am trying to say, a little more. We Are Responsible for Our Own Feelings

I am sad that this couple experienced this because I know there is nothing anyone could have done to make it any better for them. They were fighting their mind before they ever got to the meeting and everything was filtered through their preconceived expectations and perceptions which led to exactly what they were expecting.

There last sentence to me was “Maybe make sure in future people who have never been before feel welcomed.”. If you come to an event expecting to not be welcomed or expecting that others feel a certain way about you (never mind that probably not a single person there knew who they were. I certainly didn’t.), you will go way with that feeling and experience you were expecting.

So, please, try to come with an empty slate and an expectation of something good. 😀

With that attitude and expectation, hopefully you will get something good out of your experience.

Cuddle Party® with Kent Possible in The Colony

Buy your ticket to reserve your space.


A Cuddle party® is a non sexual event with about a one hour workshop on boundaries and communication followed by 2 – 2 1/2 hours (depending on the event) of platonic Cuddle time. You are, of course, free to leave at anytime.

You never have to cuddle with anyone you don’t want to, ever. They are a wonderful way to experience platonic touch in a controlled environment.


Want to attend but can’t make this one? Add your name and email to our list and get a notice when our next event takes place. https://morrismenage.com/event-list-signup/ or see our Events Calendar for all of our upcoming events.


From the Dallas Observer – http://www.dallasobserver.com/arts/pillow-talk-a-cuddle-party-facilitator-on-what-that-means-exactly-and-where-to-find-one-8803167


Here is a short video on what Cuddle Parties are about:



http://youtu.be/E7uKK7u-vsc


At a Cuddle Party you gain:


* Clarity and confidence


* Boundary and communication skills


* Comfort, support and encouragement


* The secrets to welcome, relaxed, non-sexual touch


* Possibly an Oxytocin boost (depending on if you cuddle).


Wiki on Oxytocin


Video on the benefits of Oxytocin.


The skills you learn at Cuddle Party® translate into every day life, right from the start. When boundaries and consent are clear, every relationship is easier.


Would you like more information about Cuddle Party®? Visit my site for more info–> https://morrismenage.com/what-is-a-cuddle-party/


! ! ! ! ! !     Be sure and read the email you will receive (if you get a ticket) for Important instructions and information about my Cuddle Parties.     ! ! ! ! ! !



Because I am sensitive to scents and chemicals, I endeavor to make my Cuddle Parties safe for those (like me) who are also sensitive to scents as well. Please keep this in mind when deciding on whose Cuddle Party you would like to attend. No scents are allowed at my Cuddle Parties. if you have any questions about this or would like further clarification don’t hesitate to contact me. I would be glad to explain further or answer whether something is ok to wear (generally, don’t wear anything scented at all.). Thanks!

**New policy on ticket sales **


TICKETS – The earlier you get a ticket the more you save!


Tickets the day of the event will be $35 per person, $30 the day before, $25 the week before (not including the day of and the day before) and $20 two weeks before.


A minimum of 10 tickets will need to be sold by the day before the event or the event will be canceled (so please get your tickets early).


We have limited space and ticket sales will end once we have reached the max number of people but you can get on the waiting list. Your ticket reserves your spot. Tickets are non-refundable (we are holding a space for you, if you don’t show that keeps someone else from attending).


At the door tickets are $35 (cash price, credit/debit is $3 additional). We have a high dropout rate for at the door tickets and we try to encourage online ticket sales. We have found that if someone commits enough to buy a ticket then they will usually be present. We want everyone that wants to attend a Cuddle Party to be able to attend and a no show “at the door ticket” could be keeping someone else from attending because there is always limited space.


Please contact me if finances prevent you from attending. I believe everyone should have access to Cuddle Party® and we always have a few “Work Exchange” tickets available (We always need help with setup, check in, cleanup, etc..).


LOCATION: The address of the event will be in the description of your ticket.


Absolutely no admittance after the Workshop has begun (doors close at posted time of event start), if you find you are running late, please call Kent at 903.218.4823 (I live in the country and reception is spotty. Please try again if I don’t answer right away.). Doors open and you may arrive up to 30 minutes before posted event time. Be sure and arrive early to allow yourself time to change into your pajamas if you need to.

You are, of course, free to leave at any time but everyone attending has to be there from the start so we all have the same agreements and understandings. This creates a safe place where everyone hears the same rules and understands what is expected.


NON-SEXUAL! – Cuddle Party® is a non-sexual event!


Being that this is a Non Sexual event. please be mindful of your conversations. Many people have a hard time with this subject and come to Cuddle Parties specifically because they are Non Sexual and they feel safe here. You never know what someone else has experienced or endured in their life. Please be respectful and honor our Non Sexual atmosphere.

Some people are already comfortable with touch and can’t wait to be in a place where that’s OK. Others are not even sure they want any touch at all, but come to explore some communication skills. Others are just curious about what it might be like. Whatever your reasons, a Cuddle Party is a great playground for discovering more about yourself, for exploring new ways of connecting with others, or simply enjoying a relaxing, cozy evening with other cuddly souls.


I look forward to seeing you there! 🙂

Poly Dinner Dallas

Poly Dinner

This is just a casual, monthly get-together. Family friendly.

 

Dallas Poly Dinner is a fun, monthly gathering for those who are already Polyamorous or interested. Poly-friendly folks welcome as well! This is a family event and kids are welcome.

1) Reservations with the restaurant will be made around 2PM-4PM on the proceeding Thursday. If you aren’t able to confirm your schedule before then, just message the host and we’ll see if we can still find a spot for you.

2) Maybes will not be included in the final head-count. We’ll have a buffer but if you don’t let anyone know you’re coming for sure, there might not be a seat for you.

3) Please RSVP for your guests and kids. To do this, just comment on the wall of the event with a + and the number of people you’re bringing. (Include the symbol! It makes counting it all so much easier.) You can also request a high chair if you need one.

IMPORTANT REMINDER/NOTICE:

DO NOT PARK AT RADIO SHACK!!!

There’s parking under the building but be careful if you are driving a car or vehicle that is low to the ground because you will drag when going in and when leaving.

There’s parking on Bowzer, the residential street behind the restaurant.
Oh yeah and Do not park in front of other businesses. ESPECIALLY Radio Shack. Unless you like giving money away to tow companies.

 

The Dallas Poly Dinner is the cornerstone of the poly community. For over a decade, this event has been sustained as a safe space to meet each other and be ourselves. 3rd Friday every month, time and location are usually the same.

Just a few notes on RSVPs. This event gets posted in multiple places, so if you’ve already accepted on Facebook or another Meetup group, don’t worry about doing it here so I don’t double count anyone.

Also, if you’re bringing someone who -can’t- RSVP (kids or someone who isn’t on any of the groups) then comment about it. Put + and the number of people you’re bringing and it’ll be super easy for me to get tallied up.